Kieran Culkin’s Tonight Show Audition Won Late Night This Week

Charli XCX’s social-media guru–No. 1 cultural critic of our times–pasta fan Terry O’Connor says there are four things that make a classic week in 2025: a crushing political development, a celebrity topic that we’re all hyperfixating on, a terrifying development in the natural world, and something so stupid happening on the internet that it would require hours of explanation to unpack. And late-night television is exceedingly qualified to address at least three out of four (climate collapse is tough, but Jimmy Kimmel sending two LAFD firefighters to the Super Bowl comes close).

Two clips perfectly illustrate how late night fits 2025’s vibes to a T, the place where banality meets evil: one, Stephen Colbert interviewing the current (former?) director of USAID; and two, Andy Cohen cross-examining Summer House’s Craig Conover about his breakup with Paige DeSorbo on WWHL. Both situations feature an unwieldy acronym, and both are treated with equal gravity. And in 2025, who’s to say that’s wrong? But getting the director of USAID on The Late Show was absolutely inspired. That woman deserves to be bathed in applause when she enters a room, given the week she’s had. And here’s who else you should give your attention to, given the week we’ve all had.

Ariana Grande Plays Ball

When Ariana Grande is on late night, that’s a moment to behold. Her rendition of “Imagine” on The Tonight Show is still one of my favorite Christmas carols. She is a studio-system-style talent whom the late-night format can only embiggen. Except in this Jimmy Kimmel Live! segment, which made great hay over how teensy she be. Babygirl is small, but she’s also game, and that must be acknowledged. She did incredible riffs on this music for which she had no reference. And shout-out to the JKL! staff who knew Grande would understand an “It’s a Small World” interpolation. Once a Disney Adult, always a Disney Adult.

“Keep Rubbing, Keep Rubbing. Don’t Slap It!”

CBS got my letter: more cooking segments on late night! Tete D’Or chef Daniel Boulud had a premature Valentine’s Day segment on The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, making prime rib with the host and doing some tableside Caesar salad (all I want in life is to get tableside Caesar’d). Colbert trying to do anything handy while wearing a tailored suit was already gold, but the psychosexual implications of marinating prime rib really sent this clip over the edge. Leave it to Strangers With Candy’s Colbert to find and exploit every innuendo one stumbles upon whilst cooking a roast.

John Hodgman Makes Demands on After Midnight

After Midnight did the solid of the century by reuniting Jean Grae and John Hodgman. TBH, I assume the two have had dinners since co-hosting variety shows in the mid-aughts, but I liked seeing them together professionally. This game of “Who’s Your Zaddy?” perfectly encapsulated what makes their thing work. Jean is constantly undercutting John by calling out his whiteness and privilege, and John is more than willing to embody that role for the bit. John will be the stodgy white elite if that’s the funniest role he can slot into. And if it’s a stodgy white who knows what the director of The Nightmare Before Christmas looks like, so be it.

Harrison Ford Is Down to Clown

People think Harrison Ford is a grump, but it’s not like Calista forced him into that pea costume. Ford enjoys his grump costume as much as any of the other ones he’s worn, but it’s just that: a costume. The dude is having a ball. Ford starts this Jimmy Kimmel Live! clip with a direct address to camera saying that he likes Kimmel and that he thinks Kimmel is funny. Then the two bounce off each other through a whole compatibility test, because H. Ford is actually a down-ass bitch.

Kieran Culkin Controls the Room

“He is dominating the room … Oh my God, what is happening with his hair?” — a direct quote from my husband as we watched Kieran Culkin absolutely top Jimmy Fallon on The Tonight Show while also having the cah-raziest cowlicks one has ever seen. Culkin comes in hot shouting “SIT DOWN!” before the segment even begins. Then he makes Fallon fan him, and then he makes Fallon recap the events of A Real Pain to see if he’s actually watched it. It’s gorgeous television and an incredible backdoor pilot for Culkin becoming a guest host of The Tonight Show (something he volunteered to do). All the late-night shows should have guests hosts, but only Kimmel has the balls to do it. Pick your replacement, boys. Go on vaycay, let other people do the heavy lifting, and expand your brand.