The Real Housewives of Atlanta Recap: Mother Knows Best

The Real Housewives of Atlanta has always been about mothers, both in the literal sense and regarding the affectionate title we use to crown cultural icons. Tonight’s episode is rife with representation of each definition — Mother Cynthia returns for a quick appearance as Shamea’s shoulder to cry on, and there’s an adorable scene of Kelli teaching her eldest daughter how to drive — as the current cast (minus Porsha) proves they have plenty of personal story to keep us engaged. We also see the Housewives in a more vulnerable role as daughters. I especially love this on RHOA, where their maternal relationships often touch on dynamics unique to Black women of their demographic.

Seeing any woman, particularly a Black woman, establish herself as independently wealthy without the help of a spouse or parent is admirable and reflects an urge in younger generations to live a life that wasn’t as accessible to those who came before us. This sentiment is a commonality in virtually every Atlanta Housewife’s personal story that continues to fascinate me as we move into a time where Black people may have more money than ever, yet the racial wealth gap continues to widen. RHOA allows us a window into the perspective of Black women navigating the class struggles that come with their rapid economic ascension, starting most notably with Kandi and Mama Joyce.

Many of these women’s wealth pushed them into a caretaker role, bankrolling their nuclear and sometimes extended families, and while some mothers may view it as their birthright (cough cough, Mama Joyce), it can also be a source of tension. For me, it’s a reminder that while access to money allows a certain level of convenience, it’s autonomy that I’m most grateful for as a modern woman. Angela’s mom is the perfect example. While Angela says it’s an honor to have the ability to buy her mother a house (and who can blame her), her mother chose to find somewhere to live on her own. Despite her daughter’s eagerness to take care of her, she hesitantly says she wants to be more self-reliant, which I can’t imagine is easy to admit to your child.

But there’s a level of dignity in paying your own way as a woman; even when I’ve paid all my bills to the apartment that’s in my name, just to see a two-digit balance in my account, there’s pride in doing things my mom and grandmother never got to. And if I were married and wanted a divorce, I wouldn’t have to think twice about my ability to support myself. Drew is a testament to that privilege — too many women before her were stuck in abusive marriages with men like Ralph without the resources to extract themselves. That’s not to say Drew’s route is easy; if anything, Ralph is the one clamoring at the thought of living independently without siphoning money from his wife’s career, with his dumbass confessionals and attempts at controlling her company as proof. Adding to his litany of offenses tonight is the revelation that he revoked Drew’s access to their house, essentially locking her out of the family home until he decided to let her in.

Drew’s mother, Jeanette, steps in as a voice of reason, pointing out how the divorce impacts the children. Drew, who is dealing with her own emotional regulation, is too close to the situation to fully grasp changes in their behavior and has a visceral reaction. Jeanette describes the kids as “out of control,” saying, “When I can’t control a kid, there is a problem,” prompting Drew to leave the room in tears. Seeing her baby cry then provokes Jeanette, and soon the mom and daughter comfort each other, turning their tears into cathartic laughter, another wonderful moment between generations.

Out of all the mom content tonight, I was most surprised by the revelation that Shamea and Porsha’s beef spans generations. In a previous episode, when Porsha’s mom Diane told her daughter to be wary of Shamea, saying, “You’ve got to watch the dog that brings the bone,” I wrote it off as shade, but tonight we find out there’s history to the comment. Porsha and Shamea actually met each other through their moms as kids (I love how Shamea still calls her Auntie Diane, she’s so respectful), and while the adults had a fallout, the girls remained friends. Shamea refuses to speak on the rift between the mothers in her confessional, but notes that Diane continues to question Shamea’s character, reminding her, “the apple don’t fall too far from the tree.”

What happened between Miss Diane and Mama Morton may never come out (though it might be juicy based on Porsha’s impulsive “Don’t F with my mom” post-and-delete after she saw the episode), but Porsha and Shamea’s downfall continues to play out on-screen. Shamea, loyal to a fault, is willing to put everything on the table over a meal to salvage the relationship, while Porsha listens with passive-aggressive body language. Shamea breaks the fourth wall, explaining how dealing with Porsha the Housewife is different from dealing with Porsha the friend. In her confessional, Shamea states how going full-time affected their relationship, noting that Porsha doesn’t like that now she gets to tell her side.

Shamea says she’s told Porsha that she wishes they could act more naturally on camera together, and Porsha replied, “They’d have to pay me more money for that.” Finally, Shamea’s inquiry touches on the root of the matter: Porsha is inauthentic and refuses to do the work required of a full-time Housewife yet still expects the perks. Porsha doesn’t have much to show us, considering she can’t film in her home, and she refuses to engage on any level about other things in her life, citing her divorce as an excuse. At this point, she’d be better off as a friend of like Cynthia, popping in and out of episodes, always ready to party. Instead, she’s recycling this same story about Pilar asking for Simon and patching up her friendship with Shamea with superficial hugs forced for the camera.

Porsha treats Shamea’s conflict resolution as an attack on her character and activates her alligator tears (although there are no visible tears involved.) She leaves for the bathroom, apparently burdened with emotion. When she returns, she asks the waiter to box up their food and abruptly ends the chance for further conversation. Shamea expresses disappointment in the lack of resolution and asks one more time for Porsha to listen when she’s explaining her side instead of brushing it under the rug or shutting down. Porsha agrees and asks Shamea to hold her hand. It’s reminiscent of Lindsay and Carl’s eerie hug on Summer House in the days leading to their permanent breakup, with the embrace being a metaphorical band-aid on a bullet wound. Porsha encourages Shamea to continue to bring up any grievances… but only when she has the bandwidth to receive it, which, based on the last 11 episodes, is never.

They leave the dinner with a flimsy feeling of hope, but when Shamea appeared on WWHL last week, she said she isn’t in a good place with Porsha. For now, she’s removing herself from the situation, though she remains characteristically optimistic, telling Andy Cohen that she’s willing to put in the effort if Porsha makes the first move. Please don’t hold your breath, Shamea. It might be best to let this friendship fizzle out and just remain cordial because Porsha has given you her ass to kiss time and again. The fans welcomed Shamea with open arms, surprised by the star potential in someone we viewed as a sidekick, and it would be a disservice to herself to continue clinging to Porsha’s sinking ship. With Phaedra’s imminent return next week a reminder of Porsha’s crimes, it’ll be interesting to see what the official nail in the coffin is for their friendship.

Peach Tea To-Go:

• The more I see Angela and Charles interact, the more I understand their relationship. He’s a little too dismissive for my taste, but I can tell part of it is his dry sense of humor and being on camera. Brit and Mike, on the other hand, give me glorified roommate vibes. (And how great was the episode without her? I almost forgot she was on the cast!)

• I had my own mommy moment seeing Chloe learn to drive with AirPods in — she better have been listening to calming jazz on the lowest volume! It was like watching my nephew on his scooter without a helmet. Remember what your mom said, Chloe, you have to drive for everyone!