You Can Kiss Gene Simmons’s Ass for $12k Per Day

Nothing says rock and roll quite like liquidating your 401(k) for some manual labor and a laminated badge. Gene Simmons is defending his new “Ultimate Experience” roadie and personal-assistant package, in which the Kiss co-founder is offering fans the chance to shadow him around for a day like an employee. The experience, offered to one fan per show when he begins his solo tour in May, costs a whopping $12,495. Speaking with the New York Post, Simmons said the idea was inspired by a childhood curiosity of seeing his favorite performers live. Why not try to capture that feeling now? “You meet at the hotel where you have breakfast together or, you know, whatever floats your boat,” he explained of the itinerary. “You ride with me to the gig. You can set up amplifiers and drums to your heart’s content. You’re onstage, right offstage to my right. You can video the crowds, whatever. And I pull you onstage to sing a song with me.” (You’ll also get a signed bass, which is cool.) Simmons’s gambit has seemingly inspired, of all people, JoJo Siwa, who recently unveiled a similar $900 fans-as-crew VIP package. We’ll leave you with something John Mulaney said on last week’s Everybody’s Live episode: “Kiss fascinates me because it was so much more about the money than the music. I think that’s genuinely interesting. Few artists say that, ‘We were such good marketers.’”

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